Friends.

I'm sitting here, enjoying a glass of 2009 Riesling/Gewurztraminer by OPEN, which is actually a delicious wine...and i'm thinking. I am thinking about life, love, and friends. Something happened to me this past weekend that i would like to share, and it involves friends. I realized, in stunning HD quality this weekend that when all the bullshit is boiled away, there are 2 types of friends: REAL friends, and bullshit friends. Before i get into the definition of what these friends are, let me tell you about what spawned this.

My best friend Kaycee is moving to nova scotia this weekend. She is embarking on what i can say is probably the biggest moment of her life thus far. It's something right out of a movie...picking up and moving to the east coast to be with her long lost love. Romantic? yes...a but crazy...maybe...but that's not my call. This is her call, and upon her decision, she decided for what may possibly be the last time, to get all of her friends together for a farewell party. Well she had been telling people about it for weeks, getting it ready, and looking forward to it. I had a show the night before in toronto, and made damn sure i was back in time for the party. So i get ready, make sure i am dressed to the nines, and make my way to her house. When i get there, i see a room full of people i don't even know. Not a single mutual friend of mine or kaycee's. Her one friend meaghan is there and that's it. Her brother's friends are all there, but as far as kaycee's actual friends, NO ONE was there. It was upsetting. it was angering, and it down right disgusted me.

So i asked her if anyone was coming. She said probably not. She talked to a few of our "friends", and they all had a reason why they weren't coming. The best part was the reasons: "I am not feeling well"...ok, i can MAYBE accept that one...but another one "Well...who's going to be there?"...IT DOESN'T MATTER WHO IS GOING TO BE THERE. If you are a friend, you fucking go there. I didn't know a single person in that room. I felt completely over dressed around hoodies and jeans. I hated the music, and i wanted to be outside instead of in a garage, but i FUCKING WENT. I drove back from toronto that day. I was sore. I was exhausted. But i went.

These are the same "friends" that are between 22 and 30, and still act as if they are 18...quoting family guy and thinking that they MUST get wasted if they have 1 drink. All they know are sports, and tv shows and really only care about themselves. These are the same friends who, one year for kaycee's birthday complained about the place SHE wanted to go because THEY didn't like it, and THEY didn't want to stand in line. It's pathetic.

These people are not your friends kaycee. They are no one's friends. They are only your friends when your pool is open, or you're feeding them. They are your friends when it's convenient for them to be your friends, and that's it. These are the same friends who abandoned me when me and Missy broke up, and decided they preferred to spend time with her over me. At first i was pissed, but now...hey, it's their loss, because i truly can't stand to be around them any more. There are only a couple that i really enjoy hanging around with. the others i couldn't care less about. Why? Because i don't give a shit about that episode of family guy, or that episode of simpsons, and no i didn't watch the fucking leaf game, and no i didn't cancel other cool things happening in order to WATCH the fucking leaf game.

So me and my girlfriend took kaycee out. Like real friends do. She was down. she was crying. she was very upset. So we took her out. We showed her the best time we possibly could. At least we tried. We did everything we possibly could. I tried to make her forget about it, and focus on the happy, new amazing life she has ahead of her. But i know deep down she was hurting. Deep down i was filled with hatred. A friend is not someone who is there 6 days a week, talks to you on the phone every day and says "i love youuuuuu!"....and then never comes around when you NEED them. A FRIEND is someone you can not talk to for 5 months, and then pick up right where you left off. A FRIEND is someone who will drop everything to help you at the drop of a hat if you need them. A FRIEND is someone who will pick you up when you're down even if it means doing something they don't want to do. THAT is a friend.

My friend Anthony. He's a true friend. He not only got us the show in toronto the night before kaycee's party, but he put us up in his apartment. His tiny little apartment. We were definitely a hassle, but he did it. I see anthony a few times a year now, as opposed to ALL THE TIME. but we pick up where we leave off. We are there for each other. THAT is a friend.

Where am i going with this? Well it's basically given me closure on knowing that the people i was formerly friends with really are a waste of space. They were a waste of time, and the sheer fact that i have no actual memories concerning just those people as friends should tell me something. I have a million memories involving my real friends. But none involving the people that were just around. What does this tell me? it tells me i am better than that. I am better than them. I am doing something with my life, and so is Kaycee. Kaycee is jumping on the chance to change her life. I am working every day to make something of mine...and these other people....these "friends"...well they're really doing nothing with their lives. So good fucking luck to them.

Kaycee. I love you. You're my best friend, and i wish you the best of luck on your future travels.
you always have a TRUE friend in me, and that, you can count on.