Few things make me more creative and inspired than the weather. The weather has a severe impact on my mood and my inspiration, and always has. Today is one of those days that call for a hot cup of gourmet coffee, a blanket and a book or a movie. The snow is falling, the temp is cold, and there is no better place to be than inside, relaxing and reflecting. Tonight i'm thinking a glass or 2 of wine, and some designing while some nice chill music plays in the background. But hey, that's just me...

It's on days like today though, that i really begin to think about things on a deeper level. Those of you who are familiar with my posts, or who know me quite well know that my life has been a constant revolving door of friends. Almost as if i continually rotate my roster until the perfect team has been built. Friends like richard and kaycee have been around for years, while friends like Fab and Eric are relatively new to the scene...either i just get bored with people, or i realize that a lot of people simply aren't as compatible as i thought they were with my friendship. Maturity is usually the main cause for this.

There is one friend though, I have realized that is really no longer a friend at all...rather more of an acquaintance. Which hurts me to say. This friend will not be named, nor will it be revealed if this friend is male or female, since i don't desire to make a huge deal out of it. This friend though, has gone from someone whom i told everything to, to someone who I rarely ever speak to. And when we DO speak, it's forced small talk at best. I miss this person a LOT, but i don't really feel that they miss me as much as i had hoped.

Now i will mention that this person withdrew from our friendship when they found a significant other. I will be the first to say that of course when you find someone, you don't hang out with your friends as much. That's understandable. But to completely cut yourself off is not cool. Especially considering how close we were. I suppose i am letting all this out now because i have never really voiced or even acknowledged how hurt I am. And since it is almost that time of year where i do my annual reflection blog, i guess it's hitting closer to home than i expected.

Every year i go through the same thing. I find new friends, and i shed the old ones. I know shed is a pretty harsh word to use, but those who know me know that i keep people close only if they deserve to be kept that way. If you're a douchebag or not a good friend, you will be removed. As was the case of another person i used to be quite close with and now don't even speak a word to.

Maybe i'm getting old. Maybe i am realizing that in life people come and go, and only the best of the best survive. Is that cruel of me? I don't think so...i think it's only fair to want the best people surrounding you at all times, no?

So, i sit here. A pug resting in my lap, a cup of Cafe Verona steaming by my side and a relentlessly wandering mind wondering what the next year will hold for me. As for my friend above, well...despite missing them, I wish them nothing but the best. They deserve the best, and I am happy they are happy. I mean that.

Keep checking back for the New Year's Blog
:)