WHAT A WEEKEND (part 1)

So this post is going to be massive for sure, because a lot happened this weekend that i need to write about. So this is post one, covering the first half, and Part 2 will focus specifically on one event this weekend, but it's a doozy.

So, if you didn't know, this weekend was the Red Bull Air Race weekend. A much hyped-about event that draws in tourists and locals alike, to sit out on patios all day, drinking, eating, and watching the MANY sights to be seen, including live music on almost every street corner. I just happened to be one of the live acts this weekend, and I have to say it was a fantastic experience...for the most part.

See, i am a very energetic front man, and i have the ability to work a crowd well, using little things i have learned in my years of experience. I'm also a front man that is not afraid of a little bit of controversy here and there, since i think getting a group of people riled up and into the show is worth pissing of one or two people in the process...and what better way to do this, than on the Stanley Cup final game night, when the poor red wings lost the cup to the penguins..hahahah...

being a border city next to detroit, of COURSE we are bombarded with ridiculous red wing bullshit all the time. Whatever, it usually doesn't bother me too much, unless they make it to the stanley cup finals....magically, detroit becomes "Hockeytown", and all the closet fans come out for the first time of the season just because their bandwagon is calling. Oh well, i'm sure that happens with all the teams...so what better time to stoke the fire a bit, and get people a bit riled...because after all...people that love the wings, really love the wings...but people that HATE the wings, REAALLLLY hate the wings. So as i am on stage, the night has gotten dark, the penguins have won the cup, and all the wings fans are slowly taking off their face paint and capes, so i kicked a bit of salt in the wounds, by asking my crowd who the wings fans are, and applauding them for showing their faces in public, it was a very respectable thing...people laughed...i went on for a few seconds, and then kept playing. Later on in the night i did the same thing a few times, each time getting a bigger and louder response than the time before, and the crowd was very rapidly becoming a massive audience. It was fantastic.

As i am writing this, i realize that my red wings rants really have nothing to do with the MAIN reason i am writing this blog, but the reasons kind of blended into each other...as you will read below.

So at one point, later on in the night, i would say around 11:30 or so, i feel something hit my back pretty hard, like someone slapped my back, or a friend of mine was being rough, you know? I look around and see nothing...hmm...weird...no one i noticed, no one standing there waiting to get my attention, nothing...it wasn't until a song later that i noticed a smashed up hot dog on the stage at my feet, toppings scattered...i touched my back where i was hit, only to find...ketchup.

SOMEONE THREW A FUCKING HOT DOG AT MY BACK.

Yes. A hot dog. Now at first, i though that it was just a pissed off wings fan who didn't like my opinion...then i realized that i hadn't ranted about the wings in quite a while, so i don't know what the deal was. Regardless, i went on a rampage. Now, i would be a complete liar if i said that there was no alcohol in my system, so of course i'm sure that helped fuel the fire, but i didn't care at that time.

Seriously, who throws a hot dog? and second of all, who is a fucking COWARD enough to throw it at my back? Like, honestly, if you're going to perform an act of food violence on someone, you should at least have the balls to look them in the eye while you do it, or stand your ground so they know it was you. If you don't like me, or the way i am, or what i have to say, then that's fine, but at least have the fucking courage to let me know to my face...

So after i ranted a bit, i got off the stage, and a couple people told me they saw who did it. Curious as hell, i asked what they looked like. They told me it was a girl, short black hair, black rimmed glasses...striped shrt...they didn't have to say anymore until i knew EXACTLY WHO IT WAS. While i am on stage, sometimes, i see people around me, but don't fully register what's going on until later, because i am focusing on a million different things at once...but once they mentioned her description, it all fell into place...

FLASHBACK (i'll try to make it a fast one) - a few years ago, i worked for a small customs brokerage company, and for about the last year or so i worked there, a co worker developed a deep hatred for me. Why he had this hatred, i don't really know, but i DO know (per his own confession to a mutual friend) that it was rooted in the simple fact that i am driven, ambitious, hygenic, and just an all-around goal-driven person. Ok first of all, if that's a reason to hate me, you have severe deep-seeded issues. But this guy HATED me. Like seriously HATED me, and i couldn't help but feel a little sorry for him. After all, he was just this short, round, unattractive asshole who had a little boy haircut, hated life, and everything about it. The only things in life he liked were the things that also hated life, and his overly vocal points of view were saturated in despise for everyone and everything around him. He was a real piece of work, destined to live his life in squalor, going over his dayglo abortions record collection, and just getting fatter. BUT, this piece of shit also had a girlfriend. a girl who shared his outlook on life, and his bitter attitude, peppered with a little bit of "the world owes me something", and who also worked in the same office as us...at times she could be very attractive, nice and funny, but at other times, she was a complete bitch, jumping into the immature "let's talk behind justin's back" along with her boyfriend, and a few others who felt the need to make themselves feel bigger by ripping on someone they knew they could never touch. This girl was a thin indie-wannabe kid, wearing the throwback retro clothing and listening to the 5,6,7,8s while wearing about this attitude of my shit don't stink....I can only assume it's because she used to be a fucking fat piece of shit, and people tore her apart...so once she lost all the weight, she decided to be a bitch to the people around her...These two were a couple destined to be together forever, bonded by the glue of disdain for the world around them....

Flashforward...friday night, THEY WERE THERE. Still together, still looking like a fucked up couple from a twisted Tim Burton animated movie. Him, with his cool brown cut off cargo shorts and big black hoodie, which was obviously at least an XL since he looks much fatter and disgusting than i remember him, and her, a skinny pale twig of a girl, still with a bad dye job, and greasy hair...there they were, buying food at the BBQ. I recalled this, only after the fact, since i figured the past was the past. Who cares, right? I haven't seen or heard from them in years, so i didn't care, and i figured they wouldn't care either. I was wrong. They saw me, and instead of walking away and talking trash about me between the 2 of them...they decided to take the high road, throw a hot dog at my back, and then run away like the LITTLE FUCKING COWARDS THEY ARE.

Wow. i am impressed. I mean...it takes real maturity, class, respect and courage to throw a barbecued piece of processed meat at someone's back, simply because you don't like them...and even MORE courage to not have a single actual reason to not like them, and still throw the hot dog. I mean...there are a million things you could do to express your dislike for me. You could yell mean things, you could boo after a song, you could steal my tip jar, hell you could even buy a radio ad...but no, these two champions of cowardice decided to throw a fucking HOT DOG.

Well. i will have you know that despite the piece of battered meat on the stage below me, the show still went on. And guess what, people still loved us. People cheered. people gave us money. And they did the same thing the next night, and the night after that...so what did that hot dog really do, besides display your cowardice on a public level? Nothing.

So in the end, i would like to say that these 2 people, these immature, hot dog-throwing pieces of fucking shit literally are nothing but the bottom of the barrel. They are the bottom rung, scum of the city. They will forever live in their own little world, where nothing is good enough, and everything is shit, except for the things THEY think are good enough for them. They will talk about their love of 1994, kurt cobain, and argue about Donnie Darko, like they have hundreds of times before. They will constantly think they are better than everyone around them, and i will still laugh about it...Because i know that my life will keep getting better, and i will progressing and following my goals, and their life will just stay the same every day... they will stay in their jaded little minds....and i have to laugh, because i truly feel sorry for them. I truly do. I feel sad. I know that no matter what happens in life, theirs will never get better...they will wake up every day thinking that life sucks, and the world is horrible...i just wish i cared ENOUGH to actually do something about it.

But then i realize that i really don't have the time or the desire to donate to such worthless pieces of pathetic, cowardly shit.